/ paper bags and plastic hearts, all belong to a shopping cart

came back straight home after the geography paper :/
english paper, wrote 6 pages :/ my hand hurts.
geograpy paper was also a killer, ohman, wrote so much

walked with gracethen and limin to the busstop!
limin and i were checking answers! ha ha, and gracethen kept screaming

tomorrow is chinese and history :/
ohman, haven't studied the map yetttt :/
chinese must remember the ge shi
tomorrow will be back early again

on wednesday is the science and the english paper 2
thanks for teaching me geog hon.


tomorrow is gonna be terror :/








my imagination runs wild, and trust me these thoughts that run through my mind aren't nice at all
i try not to think about the past, but sometimes i can't believe that i can actually imagine you with her
don't try to tell me what to do,
don't try to tell me what to say.
this guilt trip that you put me on wont mess me up i've done no wrong
childish shit, you've lost what you couldn't keep
don't blame me for it
i say i'm fine, i never think about it, but its always on my mind
if i say it like i mean it, i'll believe that its true.
i'm not gonna diss you on the internet, cause my momma taught me better than that
please stop telling all your friends,
i'm getting sick of them,
always staring at me like I took him from you
quit using the same lines i've used
all this sadness has become hatred
stay home and play with your barbie dolls
i'll see you on the flipside.
i dont like you, understand
karma's gonna kick you right back in the ass, for what you've said about others
i'm much better off than you now
its all over, please get up and leave
goodbye my so-called friend
goodbye, world.

happy birthday yanyee :D
her third birthday (:


/ do you know what it feels like

you're the sweetest song i know,
wake me up with sweetest surprises,
put me to sleep with the sweetest goodbyes.

we'll go to wherever our hearts take us
end up in the playground
push me on the swing,
and then you'll know that my heart's flying too

i can't ever fall in love the way i did
because what we shared will never be replaced
so believe me when i say you're irreplacable

blushing cheeks, skipping beats
this is hard to handle
but i know that you're gonna be worth it

they say we should give it time,
but time is not enough,
and thats the reason why,
when you're young you fall in love.

i'll stare into space, and wonder what you're doing right now
stare at the phone,
wondering when you'll call
walk away,
wonder when you'll catch up with me

i'm trying to read between the lines,
you've got me going out of my mind
you're the one who makes me dream when i'm awake

you put the sun into shine
you put the e in love
you're the one who's got me going round and round dizzy
its you, its you who makes me sing

thanks daphne for giving me the geography (:
tmr is geog and english, zomg :/
HELP

/ the ping pong song


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcZVpaVn-eM

i'm so sleepy :/

/ i've made so many sacrifices

after school, cabbed back with daphneeee. and then slept for so so so long! :/
just woke up in time for dinner.
i want to eat pepperlunch, but couldn't. urgh ):
i need pepperlunch, dont know why, its just a sudden craving :/

i can't wait for EOYs to be over,
godddd, i need my hair done, i need shopping sprees, i need the night safari, i need my freedom back. :/
terrible! i'm so sick of studying already.
but EOY is in 2 more days
:O, omg



i think they have pretty hair :D

dying,dying :/


10 more days to freedom

::53846:: says:
i need sumthing painful that can deal with fats
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah, so, i mean you're not THAT weak right.
tried to take a picture of love, says:
just punch somebody,
tried to take a picture of love, says:
haven't you ever done it before?
::53846:: says:
i need sumthing PAINFUL
::53846:: says:
brass knuckle is a solid chunk of metal
::53846:: says:
SOLID
::53846:: says:
the ones they use at wrestling
tried to take a picture of love, says:
so, i mean.
tried to take a picture of love, says:
just punch the guy lu
tried to take a picture of love, says:
* luh
tried to take a picture of love, says:
please luh, dont tell me you dont know how to fight?
::53846:: says:
look at jeremy and his fats
::53846:: says:
u think it will get through
::53846:: says:
hit face
::53846:: says:
i know
::53846:: says:
sheesh
::53846:: says:
fighting is instinctive
tried to take a picture of love, says:
goshhh, why do you want to fight jeremy?
::53846:: says:
self defence
tried to take a picture of love, says:
he wont fight you luh.
::53846:: says:
self def
tried to take a picture of love, says:
but you seriously shouldn't have thrown the pen at him.
::53846:: says:
SELF DEF
::53846:: says:
try me
tried to take a picture of love, says:
his head bled you know
::53846:: says:
so
::53846:: says:
i dont care
::53846:: says:
get it clear
tried to take a picture of love, says:
hello, he didn't even do anything to you
::53846:: says:
dont mess with me
::53846:: says:
dont tempt me
::53846:: says:
into doing stuff
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah, you think you're very scary is it.
::53846:: says:
coz i will do it regardless of outcome
::53846:: says:
want to try
::53846:: says:
u guys havent seen my angry b4
tried to take a picture of love, says:
you're just asking for trouble.
tried to take a picture of love, says:
i mean
::53846:: says:
yeah
::53846:: says:
if they start it
tried to take a picture of love, says:
seriously
::53846:: says:
if they dont
::53846:: says:
i wont start
tried to take a picture of love, says:
jeremy didn't even do anything to you
::53846:: says:
u havent been in my shoes b4
::53846:: says:
u dont understand
::53846:: says:
ok does b4 make fun of like almost 24/7
::53846:: says:
and if they do
::53846:: says:
do they know when to stop
tried to take a picture of love, says:
i know that, just dont care about them
tried to take a picture of love, says:
why should you care anyway
::53846:: says:
yeah i ignore till a point
tried to take a picture of love, says:
if mark and jeremy fight with you
tried to take a picture of love, says:
you're sure to lose
::53846:: says:
at least it is fun
::53846:: says:
i know contacts
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
darn this is hard to put through
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
getting into shit i dont do
::53846:: satried to take a picture of love, says:
you think you're the only one who has connections is it.
::53846:: says:
for 8 years ok my lefe
::53846:: says:
i mean
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
8 years of my life
::53846:: says:
because people think i wont do anything about
::53846:: says:
8 Years
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
8
tried to take a picture of love, says:
SO WHAT
::53846:: says:
people whack me for fun
::53846:: says:
ok yay
::53846:: says:
throw stuff at me yah
tried to take a picture of love, says:
a real guy won't fight for a small matter
::53846:: says:
insult me
::53846:: says:
yah
tried to take a picture of love, says:
they didnt even throw anything at you
::53846:: says:
wanna bet
tried to take a picture of love, says:
has it ever occured to you that you're actually in the wrong
::53846:: says:
yeah
::53846:: says:
i always am
::53846:: says:
not meaning
tried to take a picture of love, says:
but you threw the pen at jeremy first
::53846:: says:
sarcastical
::53846:: says:
yeah
::53846:: says:
so he tempt me
::53846:: says:
can u say he did nto
::53846:: says:
not
::53846:: says:
ok
tried to take a picture of love, says:
it was just for fun
::53846:: says:
i dont hit him if he doesnt do anything to me
::53846:: says:
fun
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah
::53846:: says:
ok fun
::53846:: says:
i threw for fun too
::53846:: says:
actually
::53846:: says:
i kinda thought it will miss
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah but it didn't. he actually bled.
::53846:: says:
and i dint expect it to actually hit him with the sharp part
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah, but it did.
::53846:: says:
but so it is over
tried to take a picture of love, says:
and you didnt even apologise
tried to take a picture of love, says:
that's why he's so angry
::53846:: says:
tret it as for the indians
::53846:: says:
is being racist that fun
tried to take a picture of love, says:
you can't blam jeremy for it
::53846:: says:
right
tried to take a picture of love, says:
* blame
::53846:: says:
then balme
::53846:: says:
blame* hu
tried to take a picture of love, says:
why do you need to blame anyone
::53846:: says:
sheesh
::53846:: says:
u dont feel for others i know
tried to take a picture of love, says:
i'm telling you
tried to take a picture of love, says:
that
tried to take a picture of love, says:
jeremy knows when he should stop.
::53846:: says:
is trying to stop him just abit
::53846:: says:
would it hurt u
tried to take a picture of love, says:
the teacher also tells him to stop
tried to take a picture of love, says:
so,
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
argh fuck
tried to take a picture of love, says:
you decide to punish him for that?
::53846:: says:
u dont understand ok
::53846:: says:
another reason y i never win arguements is
::53846:: says:
people think i am a loser
tried to take a picture of love, says:
i do not think that you're a loser
::53846:: says:
alot of people does
::53846:: says:
until this year
::53846:: says:
where i actually do sumthing
::53846:: says:
past 7 years
::53846:: says:
people wont even talk to to me
::53846:: says:
unless i talk to them
tried to take a picture of love, says:
do you think that by being NOT a loser you're getting more friends?
::53846:: says:
no not that
::53846:: says:
sheesh
::53846:: says:
analogy
::53846:: says:
i mean
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
last 7 years
::53846:: says:
i was a loser ok
::53846:: says:
not exaclty loser
::53846:: says:
i mena failure
::53846:: says:
bad communication
tried to take a picture of love, says:
you're giving people shit kao peh attitude by throwing things at them, or scolding them for no particular reason.
::53846:: says:
i dont do that at school
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
at school
::53846:: says:
i just try to start convo and stuff
::53846:: says:
they are like y are you here
::53846:: says:
and move off u see
::53846:: says:
nevermind
::53846:: says:
u never will understand
tried to take a picture of love, says:
why do you think i wont understand?
::53846:: says:
ok
::53846:: says:
u are like always "cool" hips and stuff
::53846:: says:
u SHOULD
::53846:: says:
have alot of friends
::53846:: says:
as shown form ur convos with jeremy
::53846:: says:
connections and stuff
::53846:: says:
and just now i actually typed wrongly
::53846:: says:
the i was suppose to be a u
::53846:: says:
u know contacts
::53846:: says:
have u ever felt isolation
::53846:: says:
and hate
::53846:: says:
by almost everyone
tried to take a picture of love, says:
have you ever thought that maybe people are not your friend because you dont come across as an open person?
tried to take a picture of love, says:
or someone who always thinks someone is against you?
::53846:: says:
i have pepe against me
::53846:: says:
it is just that
::53846:: says:
i try to be open
::53846:: says:
and get shunned
::53846:: says:
so i dont any more
::53846:: says:
until there is like
::53846:: says:
sum1 who i really think can be friends with
::53846:: says:
racists jokes i cant take
::53846:: says:
coz it is not heir fault they are dark or anything
::53846:: says:
so what makes us more superior
tried to take a picture of love, says:
its you that makes people not want to talk to you
tried to take a picture of love, says:
do you know why
::53846:: says:
i know
::53846:: says:
partly
tried to take a picture of love, says:
because whatever people do, you always seem to be like, oh, this is wrong. jeremy is so racist/
::53846:: says:
tell me the rest
::53846:: says:
not that
::53846:: says:
i didnt care about racism
tried to take a picture of love, says:
but i mean, cant you just take the joke. and if you think that he's crossed the line, then just tell him to stop.
::53846:: says:
i tried b4
::53846:: says:
then we like
::53846:: says:
he
::53846:: says:
ohh
tried to take a picture of love, says:
when i tell him to stop, he's stops what.
::53846:: says:
fat boy angry loh
::53846:: says:
sumthing sumthing sumthing
::53846:: says:
i tried a few times then i stopped
::53846:: says:
i didnt bother
::53846:: says:
u know
::53846:: says:
mark
::53846:: says:
that row
tried to take a picture of love, says:
yeah, mark and kedon?
::53846:: says:
last time i was sitting in the row
::53846:: says:
then
::53846:: says:
due to a few incidents
::53846:: says:
i stopped sitting with them any more
::53846:: says:
first year sec 1 was fine
::53846:: says:
occassional jokes
::53846:: says:
fine
::53846:: says:
and whats wrong with being studious and good at studies
::53846:: says:
they started to shun me because of that
::53846:: says:
any way bb for taking much more ok your time
::53846:: says:
ok-----of
tried to take a picture of love, says:
bye.

so tired, so sick of you critisizing my friend.
go away.
stayed back with daphne,limin and dionne.
mr.lin stayed back and taught us physics
i'm gonna flunk physics :/
went to amk hub, and then bus-ed home.

school tmr, zomg


EOYS: in 3 more days :O

/ something going on the outside, too much missing on the inside

today after school, cabbed back home, and carried all the junk, that stupid junk to clear my table for EOYs.
came home, talked on the phone with hon until 4.30 plus,
totally didn't even revise anything, i dont know, if i'll make it through.

mugging is hard, and its getting harder and harder.
but think of the life after the exams.
gonna do my hair, finally. i need it done, desperately! :O
i need to go for a hair wash, a good one too.
not sure what i want to cut for the hair, so probably i'll just want to wash it first.
i think paris hilton and jennifer love hewitt have pretty hair :D
where shall we go cut it? no more supercuts :/ though the gay guy there is really hilarious! HA HA
shopping after that, i need to get some new clothes.
i haven't gone shopping for about a month and a half :/

i seriously need to start working on my geography.
i dont care, tmr during class i'll not pay attention and just mug mug mug.
because geography is my first first first paper!
zomg.

things to do:
mug for geog,
hist,
science,
maths,
chinese.

things to do after EOYs:
go get my hair done
do some decent shopping
get new stuff
buy new things
pray hard to get into double sciences
going to sentosa
going to the night safari
shopping marathons
new shoes


so many things to do, i'm looking forward to it.
i'm scared of my end of years results.
super, i need to work hard, i need to just work harder for a few days.
and on the 8th of october, 10am, i'll be free of the chains.
the chains of hell.
i've got to remember that i'm working hard for my ownself, not cause i owe anyone anything.
if i blow my chance to get into double sciences, i can drop dead already.

enough of EOYs, they are the worst nightmare anyone could ask for.
after the darkness and sadness there will be happiness.

feeling so suffocated,
i can hardly breathe,
hold back my opinions.
sit down and keep my mouth shut,
sit at the dinner table,
enough of the nagging,
i'm through with the stress.
learn how to compose yourself,
teach yourself new lessons,
and handle it like it mean nothing to you.
because it'll be overcomed one day,
and my thoughts will be locked deep down inside.

/ i'm scared i'm scared came home after school, cabbed back with daphne, then walked her to my house
busstop, and waited for 138.
went home, and slept!

woke up and studied history, geog and science :/
ohno, i'm scared.
tmr is tuesday, boring again

6 more days, before its all over.

/ i've learnt to grow up



today went to amk hub.
walked for a little while,
and then went to bukit timah

stayed and ate dinner,
then went home

went to novena for pepperlunch
and ate matcha icecream

i'm so tired again,

/ in another life you must have been mine


after school, came back and edited.
i'm so tired, haven't finished mugging for science yet.
science paper was terrible.
went to amk hub after test,
bought paopaocha, and gogo franks
bus-ed back with daphne

i'm so tired.

/ we could talk through the night

hon woke me up this morning, and then was nearly late for school.
ran morning jog, one round only, before i had to accompany nic to the toilet.

after morning jog went back to class and then started talking talking talking.
daphne didn't come to school today, ): hur.
GET WELL SOOOON!

helena's birthday is tmrrr!heee
we're gna buy clutchies on friday :D

tmr is practice paper, english lit :/
huhh, daphne come back to school!

after school, bus-ed then walked home, hon was on the phone with me :D
went home, slept for so so long! and then got woken up by hon
:/
went to thomson to eat, and then came home
tired alr, but must chiong, its only 1 more week plus!

JIAYOUUUU

/ i'm finally out of words


i'm so out of mood now
i'm not angry, just really lost

dont feel like doing anything, or going anywhere
i can't feel any anger, and thats odd.
i just hope this will go away
i hate arguments and fights


i dont know :/
i'm lost without,
and i need you now.

today was a terrible day in school,
cried the shit out of myself.
dont ask why, maybe its the exam stresss, totally broke down and cried.
thanks jiahui, and thanks daphne for running all the way to give me a hug <3!

my eyes were hurting, and they are stilll hurting now ):
stayed back to finish chinesee, ohmy. it was so tiring.
had terrible mood swings today.
sorry for just hanging up your phone, i didn't mean to. so sorry for making you upset alright :/

went home and then watched teeevee, and then i got bored all over again.
later called hon, talked until i had to go for dinner.

followed grandma to AMK hub, to go buy her toast box.
and then bought the gogo franks! (:

thanks to all who consoled me today, thanks many!
i promise that i'll be okay.
its 10.30, i'm sleepy already. dont know why :/
no, but i'll wait until he reaches home.

tmr must go back to school at 8.45, specs stand.
urg,


/ i'll still love you when i'm gone

/ you make me dream when i'm awake

i'm so tired, EOYS coming, i cant wait for it to be over.
went to amk hub today, bought gogo franks again (:
cheese balls are nice! shared bubbletea with limin! :D

walked with daphne to find sumo houseeee, but couldn't find it! HA HA
so we walked to the bus stop, met wanying, and her bus came earlier than ours! :/
daphne and i were talk talk talking, and we're gonna do that tmr again :D
practice papers suck, yucks yucks yucks.
school's gonna be hectic,
i need to fly a kite.

/ its crazy how we lost ourselves tonight
there's a reason why they
say that we should give it time,
but time is not enough
and that's the reason why
when you're young you fall in love



jiahui sent me the photos we tooook, i look white :/
home econs was fun! we made the japanese rice balls,and daphne wans to eat it everyday! ha ha, mm, but it was really tasty (:
went to have lunch after school, slept during chinese lit, thanks wenjing for lending me your shoulder okay (:
went to buy gogo franks with daphne, and then she bus-ed home with me!
exams are coming soooon, help :/
tomorrow's lessons are gonna be so boring :O


two more days, love.

/ its so sweet lying here with you friday was fun, went to the zoo with hon, jer and derrick. then it was so so hot, kept sweating. and water there is $3! omg, even cheers sell one yakult bottle is 1.20! hello, one small tiny botlle eh. so we walked the whole zoo, and then went to derrick's place. saturday stayed over at my aunt's place. went to vivo, and then today's sunday. i have to study, and i need to do my english. there's no time already, the exams are coming :/ help!

ah shu's gonna stay till thursday! mmm, studied and mugged, and thats all. my life is so effing boring. i'm counting down the days to the zoooo. 2 more days (: and i can't wait till exams are overr. i need jiahui :/

you're too good for me.

we'll make the great escape

Paper bags and plastic hearts
All are belongings in shopping carts
It's goodbye
But we got one more night
Let's get drunk and ride around
And make peace with an empty town
We can make it right

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight

Tonight will change our lives
It's so good to be by your side
But we'll cry
We won't give up the fight
We'll scream loud at the top of our lungs
And they'll think it's just cause we're young
And we'll feel so alive

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight

All of the wasted time
The hours that were left behind
The answers that we'll never find
They don't mean a thing tonight

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway
Watch it burn
Let it die
Cause we are finally free tonight

I'm feeling so annoyed now. I dont know why, mood swings. I'm 1234567890 angry. So dont annoy me now. Fag, effing television isn't working, and i won't have a teevee for fucking long. i'm so annoyed now. went to church, and then came home. i'm not going to eat leftovers. no way. i want to eat food, proper food. i'm fat, but i need to eat because i'm human, so shut up. i'm so angry, look at my face now, i'll slap it. daddy's going to fix my imac in my room, thats good. so i'm less annoyed. was in the car, on my way back from church, thought about some stuff. and then i got really annoyed. i hate her, i really hate her. what a bitch, can't believe she was ever my friend. ANNOYING THING, SO SICKENING. so whatever _|_ i'm so damnit annoyed now. the thought of her makes me what to slap her. i desperately need chocolate. i'm a pig. i feel like screaming. its so suffocating.